Proverbs 28 23

Proverbs 28:23 kjv

He that rebuketh a man afterwards shall find more favour than he that flattereth with the tongue.

Proverbs 28:23 nkjv

He who rebukes a man will find more favor afterward Than he who flatters with the tongue.

Proverbs 28:23 niv

Whoever rebukes a person will in the end gain favor rather than one who has a flattering tongue.

Proverbs 28:23 esv

Whoever rebukes a man will afterward find more favor than he who flatters with his tongue.

Proverbs 28:23 nlt

In the end, people appreciate honest criticism
far more than flattery.

Proverbs 28 verses

Proverbs 28 23 Meaning

This proverb declares that providing sincere, constructive correction, though potentially difficult in the moment, ultimately garners more genuine respect and favor than insincere praise or flattery. It champions truthfulness and real concern over superficial politeness that masks deceit or a lack of courage to speak what is needed for growth. True favor is built on honesty and a willingness to help someone improve, even if it requires uncomfortable words.

Proverbs 28 23 Context

Proverbs 28 is a chapter rich in contrasts, particularly between the righteous and the wicked, and the wise and the foolish. It touches on themes of justice, integrity, leadership, generosity, and the consequences of one's actions and speech. This verse, Proverbs 28:23, fits directly into the chapter's overarching emphasis on wisdom's practical application in interpersonal relationships and societal living. It provides counsel on the nature of true relational benefit, highlighting that genuine growth and lasting respect come from honest, even difficult, communication rather than superficial pleasantries or manipulative praise. It underscores the proverb's focus on the long-term perspective of righteousness.

Proverbs 28 23 Word analysis

• He who rebukes (יוֹכִיחַ - yokhiyakh): This Hebrew term means to prove, convince, chastise, reprove, or rebuke. It implies a process of setting someone right, often through logical demonstration of error or direct confrontation aimed at improvement. It's not merely angry scolding, but a deliberate act of correction motivated by truth and concern for the other person's welfare. This word is actively used in contexts of bringing someone to understanding and right living.
• a man (גַּם - gam): This term universally applies to anyone. It suggests the principle holds true regardless of status or relationship. The implication is that wise people value honesty from anyone who offers it.
• will afterward (אַחַר - achar): This preposition indicates a sequence in time – "after" or "later." It crucially highlights that the benefit or favor is not immediate. Rebuke can be painful or unwelcome in the short term, but its positive outcome is realized over time. This contrasts with flattery, which may yield immediate pleasantness but has detrimental long-term effects.
• find more favor (יִמְצָא חֵן - yimtsa' chen): This phrase means "to find grace" or "to gain favor/acceptance." It refers to obtaining genuine respect, positive regard, and true relational esteem. This favor is deep, lasting, and based on trust, as opposed to a superficial or fleeting liking that flattery might procure. The "more" emphasizes the superior quality and quantity of favor.
• than he who flatters (יַחֲלִיק - yachaliq): The verb chalaq (from which yachaliq derives) literally means "to make smooth" or "to be slippery." Metaphorically, it refers to speaking smoothly, deceitfully, or with flattering words designed to manipulate, appease, or gain advantage. It suggests a lack of sincerity and often a hidden agenda. Flattery aims to please the recipient by appealing to their ego, rather than aiming for their actual well-being.
• with the tongue (לָשׁוֹן - lashon): This noun specifies the instrument used for flattery, emphasizing that words, though seemingly harmless or pleasant, can be powerfully deceptive and destructive when used insincerely. It highlights the calculated nature of flattering speech.

Words-group by words-group analysis:

• "He who rebukes a man" vs. "he who flatters with the tongue": This juxtaposition draws a sharp contrast between two approaches to human interaction and communication. One involves courageous, often difficult, truth-telling for the benefit of the other; the other involves smooth, deceitful speech designed to please or manipulate, prioritizing immediate gratification over lasting truth. It's a contrast between selfless honesty and self-serving pleasantry.
• "will afterward find more favor" vs. implicit short-term gain of flattery: The core contrast of the proverb lies in the outcome and timing. Rebuke, initially unpleasant, leads to long-term, genuine favor based on respect and trust. Flattery, while immediately gratifying to the ego, produces only fleeting or superficial acceptance and ultimately erodes trust, often leading to negative consequences for both the flatterer and the flattered. The "afterward" emphasizes patience and foresight as virtues rewarded in the long run.

Proverbs 28 23 Bonus section

The proverb implies that genuine favor or respect is built on the foundation of trust, which is established through honesty, even when that honesty is difficult. It highlights that the discerning person eventually learns to differentiate between someone who truly cares about them (who will rebuke when necessary) and someone who only seeks to please or manipulate them (through flattery). This applies not only to personal relationships but also to leadership and mentorship, where constructive criticism is vital for growth, while excessive flattery can create echo chambers and hinder development. The courage to speak truth in love, and the humility to receive it, are cornerstones of a wise life.

Proverbs 28 23 Commentary

Proverbs 28:23 distills a profound truth about authentic relationships and the nature of true wisdom. It challenges the common human tendency to seek easy approval by avoiding confrontation. True favor, the proverb argues, is not gained by telling people what they want to hear, but by speaking difficult truths out of genuine care. The act of rebuke, when done correctly, is a courageous act of love. It requires discernment to identify an error, courage to speak, and compassion to deliver the message with a heart for the other's improvement. This process, though it may cause temporary discomfort or even offense, builds a foundation of respect because it demonstrates sincerity, integrity, and a commitment to the other person's welfare.

Conversely, flattery, while superficially pleasant and perhaps ego-boosting, is inherently insincere and often manipulative. It robs the flattered person of the opportunity for self-correction and growth, leaving them ignorant of their flaws and prone to error. It is also often a tool used by those seeking personal gain or influence. Therefore, the wise discern between genuine criticism and deceptive praise, understanding that the painful truth leads to lasting good, while soothing lies lead to eventual harm. This proverb encourages not just those who rebuke, but also those who are rebuked, to value truth over comfort and to prioritize character development over fleeting popularity.